Whatever you give will surely come back to you. Give the world your best and the best will return to you. Those who brighten the world of others shall also experience brightness, which is why we need uncommon wisdom to enhance our relationships and take it to another level. Remember, no individual has suﬃcient resources to achieve greatness on their own. The scripture also reiterates this saying in Ecclesiastes 4:9. It says, “Two are better than one, for they have a better reward for their
Marital success or failure is often an oﬀ-shoot of how you handle relationships generally. If you do not know how to treat people you come in contact with on a daily basis, at work, school, etc., or you do not know how to deal with the opposite sex, similar issues will show up in your marriage.
I usually tell people that the best way to prepare for marriage is to know how to handle relationships anywhere you ﬁnd yourself. For instance, for a lady who is naturally rude and lacks courtesy, no matter how hard she tries to act diﬀerently in a marital setting, her natural self will eventually show up. No one can pretend for so long.
A Yoruba adage says, “Character is like a ﬂame that cannot be hidden; it must surely come out gradually.” It’s just a matter of time; under the right temperature and pressure, the real person emerges.
Take all relationships seriously because the life of your marriage depends on it.
- Learn To Be Courteous
Always show the common courtesies of life to everyone; treating people with respect and the right use of words will always pay oﬀ. Many people are battling marital issues while some are experiencing delays in getting married because they lack common courtesy.
Courtesy is the consideration you show for the feelings of others. By making others happy, you make yourself happy. It also covers greeting people politely. A personality without politeness is like a tyre without air.
Courtesy is the oil that lubricates human contacts; it enhances the smooth running of life. Learn to say the million-dollar words: “thank you”, “I am sorry”, and “Please”.
Remember, little hinges swing huge doors; little things can make a huge diﬀerence to someone. Courtesy should not be reserved for special guests only; it should be served to everyone, no matter their status.
Psychologists also maintain that there will be fewer broken homes and unhappy marriages if people learn the act of being courteous in their public and private lives. We take each other for granted too many times and this is the best time to change. It is often said that rude people do not humiliate their victims at all; they only reveal their own ill-bred natures. It is best to ignore them. The test of good manners is putting up with bad ones pleasantly.
- Work On Your Attitude
There is a popular saying that “Your attitude determines, your altitude.” With the right attitude, you can experience marital change. Do not let the so-called civilization and westernization rob you of your beautiful future. Work on your attitude. This amongst other things is the reason for many unhappy homes. How do you talk to people? How do you respond to corrections?
Many people who spend their time praying against external spiritual forces like witches and wizards to stop tampering with their marital heritages, should look within. Our greatest enemy is ourselves. Perhaps you are the witch mitigating against your home. You use the power of your words to say all kinds of unthinkable things to your man, yet you wonder why he stays out late every time. If there is any prayer to pray, it is for the Holy Ghost to work within you to make a change. True change must come from within us. He that must conquer the world must ﬁrst conquer himself.
Always remember that within every man is a king and a beast. The one you speak to is the one that responds to you. Yes, the man is the head, but even the head is turned about by the neck. You’re a powerful force as a woman, but you need the wisdom to inﬂuence your man.
- Do Not Perpetuate Mistakes
Satan seeks to make us repeat the mistakes of our parents, and you must never allow it. Search out the very things that marred your parents’ relationship and avoid them. Do not make the mistakes of your father. You know how his anger, selﬁshness and alcohol consumption kept you from enjoying a great home while growing up, so choose wisdom and avoid it. Do not allow Satan to turn it into a generational curse.
Dear lady, do not make the mistakes of your mother. You know how her tongue almost tore the home to shreds. Why not learn from it and build a better home? In fact, if there is any way to give your parents joy, it’s in building a better and fulﬁlled home. You are more than this. I pray for you today that God’s intervention will bring peace to every storm in your home today. Things will not get worse for you; they will rather get better.
Culled from Achieve Greatness 3-In-1 Series Handling Relationships | Gratitude | Wisdom | Yemi Davids